His Writings


Matt decided to keep a daily journal in the summer of 2009 after years of battling opiate addiction. He filled two notebooks, and the second one is the largest. The journals seemed to serve many purposes–keep track of his mood, his daily intake, and his goals. Reading them, I felt he needed to see on paper a total person. I believe he also needed to see for sure how good he was doing or how exactly he was failing at his life goals.

As I read them, I was astonished by how an addict (those who are renowned for dishonesty to self and others) could be so brutally honest. I began to question why he lied to me so often in life. I then began to realize why he lied to me so much. Few people have read the journals and come away unchanged. I would be interested to know what you garner from them.

As you read the journals, consider why you lie to others or why others lie to you. Then, maybe we can have a more honest conversation with both ourselves and with others. Maybe if enough people read his journals, our society will see why we need to dignify our responses to addiction by remembering our own humanity.

The first third of these journals are included under the drop-down menu for His Journals, but I posted them in order as I typed them up, so if you read according to this blog, you will be going backward in time. I suggest going to the beginning and reading from oldest to newest.

His complete set of journals are available at Amazon.com under the title What I Couldn’t Tell You by Matthew Edwards.


With hope for you,

Matt’s Mom

One thought on “His Writings

  1. Thank you so much for sharing your sons work. I can’t understand this world. Does anyone ever question why do we lose the most talented, kind, creative, and wonderful people? From Elvis, Prince, Michael Jackson, Vincent Van Gogh, Beethoven, and the list goes on and on. I tend to believe that the reason is not with them it is with the world. Wars, Crimes, and just how uncaring most people seem. To me the people that really care turn to an escape of this world. I never met your son, but a picture is a thousand words. I can actually feel in my heart the love he had for you just by the picture of the two of you! Also I am positive that I am not alone in having the pleasure of reading his journals, too that I among many others must thank you for sharing his ideas, work, ups, and downs. Also would love to see the movie in the future. Don’t mean to ramble on and on. Just want to make sure to thank you so much for your courage and generosity.

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